Crossing the Deserts of Life

I meditated on how God wanted to re-establish my relationship with Him. I've come to believe that it was necessary for me to encounter all that I had in my past so that I would eventually seek Him. In my life experiences I've always found myself wandering and alone, with no one to give me guidance or encouragement. It seemed like I was bewildered and lost as I trudging through my life. My desert-like crossings have been emotionally and mentally exhausting, but a learning experience.

I learned to journal some episodes of my past and this book is the reward of doing that. I sometimes was able to see the error of my ways and pray for change, not to make the same mistakes again. I've been able to measured my emotional and spiritual growth through those writings. I saw how at time I was self-absorbed and I did not trust anyone, not even God. I'm able to reflect back on the struggles and confusion of my adolescent, not knowing what direction to take, never making rational decisions. Some of my experiences led me deep into the deserts and had grave impact on how I came to turn my life over to God. Never did I realized that these difficulties would catapult me to a spiritual dimension that revealed God's love for me.

He still continues to develop and mature my relationship with Him. I understand now that as long as I stayed self-reliant and self-centered, my relationship with others will always be empty and desolate like a desert. Because of His unconditional love for me, He has led me to a place of rest and restoration, an oasis in the Desert.