First Light

The worst part of Tuesday wasn't writhing in pain, having flames shoot from her head, voiding her bowels and dying in screaming agony in front of a crowd of cheering onlookers. No, the worst part of Tuesday for Beverly Castler was finding out that the afterlife began in Newark, New Jersey. What a dump...

For Lem, his day ended in being abducted by drug runners in a magic truck full of corncobs and cocaine. It didn't seem right to Lemuel Rickenbacker that it started with desperately wanting to boil the children in hot oil, but it did. Perhaps that was the punishment. There was also the matter of why anyone would want 24,000 pounds of chicken beaks and an assortment of items including a pile of rusty tricycles and three pairs of brand-new Canadian Sauna Pants...