Growing Up Ugly

In the South, you're brought up to be respectful and well mannered. You don't look ugly, you don't act ugly, and you never divulge the ugly secrets that go on behind closed doors.

I was born in the 70's and raised in the 80's. It was a very typical GenX upbringing. I saw my mom in the morning before school, and the rest of the day and night was left to make it on my own. We didn't know what it was to "be offended" or "violated", in fact we were just told to be safe and, don't go in and out of the house but, be back by dark. So, my friends and I were basically feral children left to run the streets and take care of ourselves.

Some of us grew up in families that loved us, protected us, and made sure we had all we needed. Some of us grew up in single parent households or were raised by other family members who took on the parenting role. And still, others, may have raised themselves and lived each day in survival mode. I actually went through all three circumstances.

Why are you laying there hugging on your momma?

What are you, a lesbian?

No, I wasn't a lesbian, I was ten years old and just wanted to find comfort in my mother's arms. That was the day I stopped seeking comfort from anyone else. That was the day I knew that I only had myself to depend on. That was the day I refused to give in to emotions and started living in survival mode.

This is my story.