I Shouldn't Love This Way

Everyone wants to fall in love. And those who run... are running from the intensity of love. It's all consuming. It burns you alive and resurrects you. I didn't want to lose myself in Aria. But the truth is, I had. Every part of me desired to merge with her. Terror and beauty go hand in hand with opening your heart. It's a paradox, really. I couldn't reveal the darkest parts of my past to her. It was bad enough that I had pulled her into hellfire when I moved her to California with me and my wife... Los Angeles: the city of fallen angels.From the second our eyes had locked in that courtroom in NYC, I knew. I fucking knew, and I lied to myself. It was an ugly truth I didn't want to face... a shameful one. My undeniable attraction to Aria was endless spiritual warfare. It didn't matter that I was older. It didn't matter that I was meant to be her protector and nothing more. I... craved her. Every. Fucking. Day.I had battled addiction before. But this was so much worse. Loving Aria had pushed me into purgatory all over again. It was my curse. I thought I could protect her from my brother Evan. The irony was that I needed to protect her from myself. Our love is... forbidden.