I, Witness

I was a lone sinner, dying of cancer, and carrying the burden of guilt when Christ came to me. It was by His grace, and His grace alone, that He showed me mercy, and because I believed, He saved me.

Really, I am a very ordinary person, but God did an extraordinary thing for my salvation. This was my problem: I wanted to be a “better Christian.” I wanted unshakable faith, like Daniel in the lion’s den. However, I wasn’t really able to do it. I tried to do it with my mind. I tried to do it by “works.” I tried to do it with my will.

I was tripped up by my own efforts. I sat in the same church pew for nearly twenty years, said the same words every Sunday, and tried as hard as I could to believe them all. I gave to the offering, to charities, to capital campaigns, went to “work Saturdays,” attended finance committee meetings, helped after church services to count the collections.

Then, I was diagnosed with cancer, stage four. To be completely honest, I was scared inside. “No! Not now! I’m not ready!” But I was ripe for testing. God doesn’t wait until we feel ready. He sees all, we do not. God uses all things, even calamities and floods and wars for ultimate good. Everything in my life, my childhood, my sins, wrong turns, even cancer, has led me to be exactly the person I am now: a witness to the Risen Christ.