If you're sexy and you know it slap your hams

If you’re a snack-motivated sexpot with limited critical faculties when it comes to pop culture and a tendency to overshare, clap your ass. 

If you’re dead inside and you’re crying out to be woken up there (a la Evanescence) and you really want to show it; if you’re sexy and you know it slap your hams 

… and then read this book.

This is a good book for bad people, no judgement. A good book for people who like a procession of dog’s dicks, groundhogs, asses, nose picking, depression and bisexual innuendo. A poetry collection like nothing else but actually like a lot of other things. Like chicken soup for the soul, except someone misheard and they used chicken poop instead. And now they have chicken poop instead of a soul.