I'll Have Mine Straight Up

ELEVEN YEARS Shhhhh! Enough on the years. I am not collecting years, just days. 4017 days on my sobriety birthday, July 12, 2015. Last time I checked, we are all on the same day- Today. This year leading up to my sobriety birthday in July looked strangely like the six months leading up to the day I stopped drinking. From January to July in 2004, I was not sober much of the time. We received the news this year that my husband had a rare form of thyroid cancer requiring surgery and two types of radiation. During that same time, my mother died suddenly of a heart attack. I went through the loss of several other friends and their memorials tightly packed together right after my mom's death-then recently, my only niece's death. The difference? I didn't drink through any of what has happened this year. There is nothing in this life that we can experience that a drink won't make worse. Walking through the emotions of it all is hard. People said I would "feel better" when I got sober. Yes, I am feeling my feelings better because I am present. Stuffing the feelings by drinking was keeping me in denial and stuck. I "feel" better because I am not checking out. Feelings are not facts. The feelings pass. Growth happens. I can move on and live. Now, I am living all of this life straight up! You can too. I pray that for you.