Humor & tecknade serier
Men are so Easy: How To Tame Men Until They Will Eat Out of Your Hand And not Bite In Ten Easy Lessons
Mike Riley • Michelle Riley
Häftad
199:-
Uppskattad leveranstid 5-10 arbetsdagar
Fri frakt för medlemmar vid köp för minst 249:-
Men are so easy to control; it is amazing we have so much trouble. Remember when we were in High School and we played our favorite game? Told all the boys, 'Come here, ' then, 'Go away.' And the boys would obey us; desperate for a kind glance from us, or a kiss, or maybe getting to first base. Now that those boys are men, they are more used to our ways. But we can still control them if we just make the effort and know how. They are easy to figure out. Every thought they have revolves around sex. Even sports are but a way to become a hero so they can score some more sack time with a beauty like you. Men love to look at porn. No one knows why. It is just the way She made men. Be sure to sneak some photos of your nude self into his collection. Make sure you take them just after a diet and after applying some make up. You are competing with 19 year olds! Be passionate. Claw his back during love making. Scream when you orgasm. He will love it. He will think you are Eve reincarnate. Use his body to turn yourself on. Pretend he is a giant vibrator! Use him like a thing! He will love it; strange creature that he is. Life can be boring, especially if he has a boring job. Don't let him take it out on you. Bored sex is at the best, well, boring. Don't put up with it. Men love to chase women, especially new to them women. Use your skill as an actress to become a woman of mystery for him. He will stay with you forever. If men don't get any, they might become violent. Don't put up with it. You are also a violent creature. The Israeli Army had to stop putting women in the front lines. After killing an enemy, they would stop, pull out a knife and mutilate him. Not all women, but enough to freak out the men on their side. If the case demands it, let your violent side out. You can scare the bejesus out of him if you want. Weird animal that he is, it will turn him on! Do you think you are a slave, bound to obey, sworn to spread you legs at the merest command? Men think you are. They believe that once they marry you, you become their possession. Bastards! Beat him at his own game. If he married you, then you married him. He is your possession to do with what you want! Use him! See if he likes it. (Chances are, he will. He will think you are one hot lady!) Gamesmanship is a part of life. It is a game that men play as if to lose is to die. Don't let him play this game with you. Don't let him control if you work or not. Remember, you married him. He is your possession. He is yours to do with what you want. Use your wiles to get your way. Don't let him even think of winning the war, he can win battles if he wants, winning the war is what counts. Men will do almost anything to get laid. Tell him if he jumps off the garage roof, you will jump his bones. Watch him go! We are the smarter of the sexes. We should be in control. Actually we are in control; all we have to do is offer the right bait. It is ours to offer. Watch him jump! Men will do anything for a kind word from you. Who would have thought? And so easy! If he is shouting at you, say, "Stud, you turn me on so when you aren't shouting. And when you rub my back, I get so hot for you." Is that sexist? If so, so what? It works. Men can be controlled. Men can be turned into, if not the perfect husband, at least one that can be lived with. Men are easy. Easy to control, easy to live with, easy to love. All it takes is understanding that men are all about sex.
- Format: Häftad
- ISBN: 9780989553292
- Språk: Engelska
- Antal sidor: 32
- Utgivningsdatum: 2015-08-01
- Förlag: Falcon Marine