Not Easy

"Do you think it's actually real?" I asked. My eyes were glossy and dazed as my mind was far away from my reality.

"What's real?" Was the response I was given.

"Love" I sighed. A single tear slipping from my eye as they landed upon the scene in front of me. There were white flowers adorning every wooden beam as it formed an archway for two people to stand under and vow to love each other until death.

"I don't know. I'd like to believe it's real" I finally looked up to meet Josh's blue eyes.

They were staring at me curiously and with slight sympathy towards me. I'm sure my brown eyes reflected back to his with hope and sadness. However, I'm sure there was the hint of happiness I found at watching two people be in love.

"I think we all have someone out there. Someone made just for us but some people don't get to meet them" My voice was low as to not disturb others but also because it was more of an inner thought rather than something I wanted other people to hear. I had always felt this way.

Growing up I struggled to find boys that I was attracted enough to where I would want to date them, commit to them and only them. It made me think that it was just because I was yet to meet the one.

People would often say I was too young to think about all of that and I should just be focusing on school, work and what I wanted to do in life, but I couldn't help myself to always think about what it would be like to have someone in the world that was made for you and only you.