Resilient

The Memoir of a man who grew up facing adversity and chasing the American Dream and never gave up.

On several occasions after hearing me tell a few stories over the years, people mentioned that I should write a book about my life. It's filled with interesting anecdotes that shaped the person that I am and as I looked back on it all, I came to the realization that my story is not all that unique. There are countless people in the world who have endured equally difficult lives and in many cases much worse than mine and my heart goes out to them. For me, this was a monumental feat and I feel blessed to have accomplished it. I believe some people will relate to my book and others may be inspired. I spent 2 years working on it and in the beginning, I experienced horrible flashbacks that led to severe anxiety attacks. I sought therapy because I needed professional help in dealing with those powerful emotions. I opened Pandora's box and left the lid open searching for "Hope" at the bottom of it. The amount of work I had to put in just to heal from the PTSD was immense and I did not set out to create this book to share with the public. I wrote this book to personally heal and move past my years of depression and trauma. Many of my family and friends do not know this information and I wanted to share it with them so they could know me better. After my memoir was complete, I decided that I would also like to share it with the world in hopes that it may help someone understand that dark days don't last forever because there will always be light at the end of the tunnel. You just have to keep fighting and moving forward.

I have a few tattoos on my body that have deep personal meaning. They translate to being resilient and are based on the "Legend of the Koi fish and the Waterfall," from beautiful Asian culture. The story is about Koi swimming upstream against the powerful current for a hundred years. Some turned back because it was too challenging. For the ones who continued, the reward was in the journey to learn how to persevere through difficult times. They swam upstream until they reached the waterfall. Many tried to jump to the top but most of them gave up and swam back down stream to an easier life. One day, a very special Koi realized that if he swam down to where it was the darkest and deepest, he would be able to increase his upward momentum. Up and up he swam gaining speed and power. He gave it everything he had as he jumped out of the water landing at the top of the waterfall. He was rewarded for his resilience, intelligence and fortitude by being turned into a Golden Dragon. Another one of my nicknames is "The Golden Dragon" because I identify with that one particular Koi who made it through in spite of the difficulties in life.